MS-HRC-SB-5-9-3

[2330.2] move, to [xx] act like a body endowed
with despair, that's how I reason, how I
hear myself reasoning, that's all lies,
it's not me they're calling, it's not me
they're talking about, it's not yet my
turn, it's someone else's turn, that's why
I can't stir, that's why I don't feel a body
on me, I'm not suffering enough yet,

[2330.2] it's not yet my turn, not enough to be
able to stir, to have a body, with a head,
to understand with complete with head,
to be able to understand, to have eyes to
light my w the way, I merely hear,
without understanding, without being able
to take advantage of [wha] benefit by what I
hear to take advantage of what I hear to go,

[2330.2] and be done with hearing, I don't hear
all ^everything, that must be it, the important
things escape me, it's not my turn, [the]
the topographical and anatomical
indications in particular do not reach me,
[2330.3] no, I hear everything, I must have
heard everything, what difference does it
make, as long as it's not my turn, my

[2330.3] turn to understand, my turn to live,
my life sentence, it calls that life,
the space of the way from here to the door,
it's all there, in what I hear, some-
where, if all has been said, all this time,
all must have been said, but it's not
my turn to know what, to know [x] who I
am, where I am, and what I should do

[2330.3] [xxx] stop being to stop being it, to stop
being there, that's reasonable enough, so as
to be another, no, the same, I don't know,
depart into life, travel the road, find
the door, find the axe, perhaps it's
a cord, for the neck, for the throat,
for the cords, or fingers, I'll have eyes,
I'll see fingers, it' it will be the silence,

[2330.3] perhaps it's a drop, find the door, open
the door, drop, into the silence, it won't
be I, I'll stay here, or there, more likely
there, it will never be I, [2330.4] [x] that's all been
done already, said and said [x] again,

[2330.4] the departure, the body that rises, the
way, [in] in colour, the arrival, the door
that opens, closes again, it was never I,
I've never stirred, I've listened, I
must have spoken, why deny it, why not