MS-WU-MSS008-3-50-2

[3848] one, that later on his comings and his goings should not be hemmed about
with darkness and with dangers. [3849] And similarly I might have told him to
be careful about the bell, to unscrew the little cap and examine it well
inside, so as to make sure it was a good bell and in good working order,
before concluding the transaction, and to ring it to hear the ring it
made. [3850] But we would have time enough, later on, to see to all these things.

[3851] And it would be my joy to help my son, when the time came, to fit his
bicycle with the best lamps, both front and rear, and the best bell and
the best brakes that money could buy.

[3852] The day seemed very long. [3853] I missed my son! [3854] I busied myself as best
I could. [3855] I ate several times. [3856] I took advantage of being alone at last,
with no other witness than God, to masturbate. [3857] My son must have had the
same idea, he must have stopped on the way to masturbate. [3858] I hope he
enjoyed it more than I i ^{[place = overwritten] d}id. [3859] I circled the shelter several times, thinking
the exercise would benefit my knee.

[3860] I moved at quite a good speed and
without much pain, but I soon tired. [3861] After ten or eleven steps a great
weariness h ^{[place = overwritten] s}eized hold of my leg, a heaviness rather, and I had to stop.
[3862] It went away at once and I was able to go on. [3863] I took a little morphine.
[3864] I asked myself certain questions. [3865] Why had I not told my son to bring me
back something for my leg?

[3866] Why had I hidden my condition from him. [3867] Was
I secretly glad that this had happened to me, perhaps even to the point
of not wanting to get well? [3868] I surrendered myself to the beauties of the
scene, I gazed at the trees, the fields, the sky, the birds, and I
listened attentively to the sounds, faint and clear, borne to me on the
air.

[3869] For an instant I fancied I heard the silence mentioned, if I am
not mistaken, above. [3870] Stretched out in the shelter, I brooded on the
undertaking in which I was engaged ^{[place = supralinear] embarked}. [3871] I tried again to remember what I was
to do with Molloy, when I found him. [3872] I dragged myself down to the stream.
[3873] I lay down and looked at my reflection, then I washed my face and hands.