MS-WU-MSS008-3-50-2

36^(a)

[3050] far as to shake her by the hand, which she hastily wiped, as soon as she
grasped my intention, on her apron. [3051] When I had finished shaking it, that
flabby red hand, I did not let it go. [3052] But I took one finger between the
tips of mine, drew it towards me and gazed at it. [3053] And had I had any tears
to shed I should have shed them then, in torrents, for hours. [3054] She must
have wondered if I was not on the point of making an attempt on her virtue.
[3055] I gave her back her hand, took the sandwiches and left her.

[3056] Martha had been a long time in my service. [3057] I was often away from
home. [3058] I had never taken leave of her in this way, but always off-
-handedly, even when a prolonged absence was to be feared, which was not
the case on this occasion. [3059] Sometimes I depart^ed without a word to her.

[3060] Before going into my son's room I went into my own. [3061] I still had the
cigar in my mouth, but the pretty ash had fallen off. [3062] I reproached myself
with this negligence. [3063] I dissolved a sleeping pow^der in the milk. [3064] He asked
for a report, he'll get his report. [3065] I was going out with the tray when my
eyes fell on the two albums lying on my desk. [3066] I wondered if I might not
relent, at any rate so far as the album of duplicates was concerned.

[3067] A
little while ago he had come here to fetch the thermometer. [3068] He had been a
long time. [3069] Had he taken advantage of the opportunity to secure some of
his favourite stamps? [3070] I had not time to check them all. [3071] I put down the
tray and looked for a few stamps at random, the Togo one mark carmine with
the pretty boat, the Nyassa 1901 ten reis, and several others.

[3072] I was very
fond of the Nyassa. [3073] It was green and showed a ^giraffe ^{[⁁]grazing off} the top of
a palm-tree. [3074] They were all there. [3075] That proved nothing. [3076] It only proved
that those particular stamps were there. [3077] I finally decided that to go
back on my decisⁱon, freely taken and clearly stated, would deal a blow
to my authority which it was in no condition to sustain. [3078] I did so with
sorrow. [3079] My son was already sleeping. [3080] I woke him. [3081] He ate and drank,