Digital Manuscript ProjectMalone meurt / Malone Dies

[1363] bonic gas, then say thanks for the nice time and go.
[1364] That has
always been my dream at bottom, [1365] all the things that have always b
been my dream at bottom, [1366] so many strings and never a shaft.
[1368] Yes,
an old foetus, that's what I am now, [place = inline] [⁁] [place = supralinear] hoar and impotent, mother is done for, I've rot-
ted her, sh' [place = overwritten] e'll drop me with the help of gangrene, pr [place = overwritten] erhaps papa
is at the party too, I'll land head-foremost mewling in the
charnel-house, not that I'll mewl, not worth it.
[1369] All the stories
I've told myself, clinging to the putrid mucus, and swelling,
swelling. [place = overwritten] , [1370] S [place = inline] [⁁] [place = margin left] s[ [place = supralinear] s]aying,[ [place = margin left] l.c.] Got it at last, my legend.
[1371] But wh
h [place = margin right] y this sudden
heat, has anything happened, anything changed?
[1372] No, the answer is
no, I shall never get born and therefore never get dead, and a
good job too.
[1373] And if I tell of me and of that other who is my
little one, it is as always for want of love, well I'll be bugger-
ed, I wasn't expecting that, want of a homuncule, I can't stop.
[1374] And yet it sometimes seems to me I did get born and had a long life
and met Jackson and wandered in the towns, the woods and wilder-
nesses and tarried by the seas in tears before the islands and
peninsulas where night lit the little [place = inline] , brief yellow lights of man
and all night the great white and coloured beamns [place = margin left] [₰] shining in the
caves where I was happy, crouched on the sand in the lee of the
[1374] rocks with the sma [place = overwritten] ell of the seaweed and the wet rock and the noise
howling of the wind [place = inline] , the waves whipping me with foam [place = inline] , or sighing on
the beach softly clawing the shingle, no, not happy, I was never
that, but wisj [place = overwritten] h wishing night would never end and morning never come
when men wake and say, Come on, we'll soon be dead, let's make the
best [place = inline] [⁁] [place = margin left] most [ [place = supralinear] most] of it.
[1375] But what matter whether I was born or not, have lived
or not, an [place = overwritten] m [place = supralinear] m dead or merely dying, I shall go on doing as I have al-
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Malone meurt / Malone Dies © 2017 Samuel Beckett Digital Manuscript Project.
Editors: Dirk Van Hulle, Pim Verhulst and Vincent Neyt