
[0774] have done, and I would have done it gladly.
[0775] And yet I did not do it.
[0776] All the things you would do gladly, oh without enthusiasm, but gladly,
all the things there seems no reason for [place = supralinear] your not doing, and that you do not
do!
[0777] Can it be we are not free?
[0778] It might be worth looking into.
[0779] But
what was my contribution to this burial.
[0780] It was she dug the hole, put
in the dog, filled up the hole.
[0781] On the whole I was a mere spectator,
[0782] I contributed my presence.
[0783] As if it had been my own burial.
[0784] And it was.
[0785] It was a larch.
[0786] It is the only tree I can identify, with certainty.
[0787] Funny she should have chosen, to bury her dog beneath, the only tree I
can identify, with certainty.
[0788] The sea-green needles are like silk and
speckled, it always seems [place = supralinear] [⁁]ed to me, with little red, how shall I say, with
little red specks.
[0789] The dog had ticks in his ears, I have an eye for such
things, they were buried with him.
[0790] When she had finished her grave she
handed me the spade and began to muse, or brood.
[0791] I thought she was
crying [place = supralinear] [⁁]going to cry, it was the thing to do, but on the contrary she laughed.
[0792] It was
perhaps her way of crying.
[0793] Or perhaps I was mistaken and she was really
crying, with the noise of laughter.
[0794] Tears and laughter, they are so much
Hebrew to me.
[0795] She would see him no more, her Teddy whom she had loved
like her own [place = supralinear] [⁁]an only child.
[0796] I wonder why, since she had obviously made up her
mind to bury the dog at home, she had not asked the vet to call, and
destroy the dog [place = supralinear] [⁁]brute on the premises.
[0797] Was she really on her way to the vet
at the moment her path crossed mine. [place = overwritten] ?
[0798] Or had she said so o [place = overwritten] solely in order
to attenuate my guilt?
[0799] Private calls are naturally more expensive.
[0800] She
ushered me into the drawing-room and gave me food and drink, good things
without a doubt.
[0801] Unfortunately I didn't much care for good things to eat.
[0802] But I quite liked getting drunk.
[0803] If she lived in embarrassed circumstances
there was no sign of it.
[0804] That kind of embarrassment I feel at once.
[0805] Seeing how painful the sitting posture was for me she fetched a chair for
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Molloy © 2016 Samuel Beckett Digital Manuscript Project.
Editors: Magessa O'Reilly, Dirk Van Hulle, Pim Verhulst and Vincent Neyt