MS-HRC-SB-5-10

[1435] at such a place, about the reality of which I do not propose to
quibble either, of so vast an urn does not strike me as very
credible.[1436] No,[1437] I merely doubt that I am inside it.[1438] It is easier to
erect a shrine than have the object of worship elect his dwelling
there.[1439] But I am getting mixed ^{tour et alentour}.^{xxx in the xxx the xxx xxx this muddle!}[1440] That's what comes of distinguos^ctions.
[1441] No matter.[1442] She loves me, I've always felt it.[1443] She needs me.

[1444] Her
business, her garden, her husband, her children if she has any,
are not enough, there is in her a void that I alone can fill.
[1445] It is not surprising, under these conditions, if she has visions.
that she should have visions.[1446] There was a time I thought she was
perhaps a near relation, of mine, mother, sister, daughter, or
suchlike, even wife, and that she was sequestrating me.

[1447] That is
to say Mahood, seeing how little impressed I was by his chief
witness, whispered this hypothesis in my ear, adding, I have said ^{haven't said}
nothing ^{a word}.[1448] I must say ^admit it is not so preposterous as it looks at
first sight.[1449] It even accounts for certain bizarreries which had
not yet struck me at the time of its formulation, among others my
inexistence in the eyes of those who are not in the know, that is
to say all mankind.

[1450] But assuming I was being stowed away in a
public thoroughfare, why go to all this ^such trouble to show off my
head, artistically illuminated from dusk to midnight?[1451] You may say ^retort
that results are all that count.[1452] Another thing.[1453] This woman has
never spoken to me, as far as I know.[1454] If I have said anything to
the contrary, I was mistaken.[1455] If I say anything to the contrary
again, I shall be mistaken again.[1456] Unless I am mistaken now.

[1457] Into
the dossier with it in any case, in support of whatever thesis you
like.[1458] Never an affectionate word, never a reprimand.[1459] For fear of
drawing people's attention to me?[1460] Or lest the illusion should be
dispelled?[1461] I shall now sum up.[1462] The moment is at hand when my only
believer must deny me.[1463] Nothing has happened.

[1464] The m^lanterns have
not been lit.[1465] Is it the same evening?[1466] Perhaps dinner is over.[1467]
Perhaps Marguerir^te has come and gone, come again and gone again,
in her usual way, without my having noticed it ^her.[1468] Perhaps I have
blazed with all my usual brilliance, for hours on end, all un-
suspecting.[1469] And yet something has changed.It is not a night like

[1470] It is not a night like