MS-UoR-1227-7-12-4

[0028] no pain there no pine there...no sense there

no pain there...no sense there...so far...ha!...so far...

[0029] then thinking...another thought...oh long after...
sudden flash...perhaps something she had to...had to...
tell...could that be it?...tiny little thing...before
its time...hole in the bog...never any love...spared
that..speechless all her days...^[C] practically speechless...
how she survib^ved...that time in court...what had she to

[0029] say for herself...guilty or not guilty...speak up woman...
stood there staring at nothing...mouth half open as
usual...waiting to be led away...glad of the hand on her
arm... now this...something she had to^...tell...could that
be it?...something that would say^{...how it was...could - ...what?...had been?...yes...something that would say...how it had been...how she}...how it had been...
how she ^{had had} survived ^{how she had survived}...lived on and on...guilty or not gui

[0029] guilty...to be sixty...something she - ...what?...
sixty-five ^seventy?...yes ^{my God!}...lived on and on...to be sixty-five ^seventy
...something she didn't know herself...wouldn't know if
she heard...then forgiven...mercify^ul God...tender mer-
cies...new every morning...

[0030]back in the field...could
that be it?...bound to in the end...out with it in the
end...say everything go on long enough...then back in
the field^{...April morning}...face buried in the grass...nothing but the
larks...pick it up there...get on with it from there...
another few - ...what?...not that?...nothing to do

[0030]with that?...nothing she could say ^tell?...all right...
something else...think of something else...oh long aft
after...sudden flash...not that either...all right...
something else again...so on^...hit on it in the end...
think everything go on long enough...[0031]then

[0031] back in the -
...what?...not that?...nothing to do with that?...
all right...noth nothing she could think?...all right...
nothing she could say ^tell...nothing she - ...what?...who?...
what?...no...no!...she...^{movement 4} tiny little thing...before its
time...hole in the bog...parents unknown...no lob^ve...
spared that...^[B] speechless all her days...practically
speechless...even to herself...never out loud ^aloud......

[0032]B^but
not completely...not completely speechless...sometimes
sudden urge...once or twice a yer^ar...alwayw^s winter for
some reason...the long evenings...sudden urge to...
tell...then rush out and stop the first person she saw...

[0033]nearest lavatory...start pouring it out...steady stream..
wild stuff...half the vowels wrong...pine for pain...
that kind...no one could follow...till she saw the
look ^stare she was getting...then die of shame...once or
twice a year...always ^{mostly [Stet]} winter for some [⁁]^strange reason...no^w this... ^[H]

[0034]keep on trying...not knowing what...what she was trying..
whole body like gone...only the face...keep on - ...
what?...the buzzing?...yes...all the time the buzzing...
steady roar...in the skun^ll...and the beam...on and of ...
poking around...painless...so far...ha!...so far...keep
on trying...(curtain starts slowly down)...not knowing
what...what she is trying...no-matter ^{what?...who?...what?...no...no!...she...(pause) who what she is saying...no matter...} [0035]^{(curtain starts slowly down)..}...hit on it in