[p. 106r]
[1917] compared to others, I mean those I have tried, is this, that when you want to rest you stop and rest, without further ado.
[1918] For standing there is no rest, nor sitting neither.
[1919] And there are men who move about sitting,and even kneeling, haulig [place = overwritten] ng themselves to right and left, forward and backward, with the help of hooks. [1920] But he who moves in this way, crawling on his belly, like a reptile, no sooner comes to rest than he begins to rest, and even the very moe [place = overwritten] vement is a kind of rest, compared to other movements, I mean those that have worn me out.
[1921] And in this way I moved onward in the forest, slowly, but with a certain regularity, and I covered my fifteen paces, day in, day out, without killing myself.
[1922] And I even crawled on my back, plunging my crutches blindly behind me into the thickets, and with the black boughs for sky to my closing eyes.
[1923] I was on my way to Mother.
[1924] And from time to time I said, Mother, to cheer me I suppose. [1925] I kept losing my hat, the lace had broken long ago, until in a fit of temper, I banged it down on my skull with such violence that I couldn't get it off again.
[1926] And if I had met any ladyfriends, assuming I had ladyfriends, I would have been powerless to salute them properly. [1927] But there was always present in my mind, which was still working, if laboriously, the need to turn, to keep on turning, and every three or four jerks I altered course, which permitted me to describe, if not a circle, at least a great polygon, perfection is not of this world, and to hope that I was going forward in a straight line, in spite of everything, [place = overwritten] ,day and night, towards my mother.
[1928] And true enough the day came when the forest ended and I saw the light, the light of the plain, exactly as I had foreseen.
[1929] But I did not see it from afar, trembling beyond the harsh trunks, as I had expected, but suddenly I was in it, I opened my eyes and saw I had arrived.
[1930] And the reason for that was probably this, that for some time past I had not opened my eyes, or seldom.
[1931] And even my little changes of course were made blindly, in the dark.
[1932] The forest ended in
[p. 107r]
[1932] a ditch, I don't know why, and it was in this ditch that I became aware of what had happened to me.
[1933] I suppose it was the fall into the ditch that opened my eyes, for why s [place = overwritten] would they have opened otherwise?
[1934] I looked at the plain rolling away as far as the eye could see.
[1935] No, not quite so far as the eye could see. [1936] For my eyes having got used to the light, I fancied I saw, faintly outlined against the horizon, the towers and steeples of a town, which of course I could not assume was mine, on such slight evidence.
[1937] It is true the plain seemed familiar, but in my region all the plains looked alike, when you knew one you knew them all. [1938] Anyway, whether it was my town or not, whether somewhere under that faint haze my mother breathed or whether she poisoned the air a hundred miles away, were ludicrously idle questions for a man in my position, though of undeniable interest on the plane of pure knowledge.
[1939] For how could I drag myself over this vast moor, where my crutches would fumble in vain.
[1940] Rolling perhaps.
[1941] And then?
[1942] Would they let me roll on to my mother's door? [1943] Fortunately for me at this painful juncture, which I had vaguely foreseen, but not in all its bitterness, I heard a voice telling me not to worry, that help was coming.
[1944] Literally.
[1945] These words struck it's not too much to say as clearly on my ear, and on my understanding, as the urchin's thanks I suppose when I stooped and picked up his marble.
[1946] Don't worry Molloy, we're coming.
[1947] Well, I suppose you have to try everything once, succour included, to get a complete pick [place = overwritten] ture of the resources of their planet.
[1948] I slithered down to the bottom of the ditch.
[1949] It must have been Spring, a morning in Spring.
[1950] I thought I heard birds, skylarks perhaps. [1951] I had not heard a bird for a long time.
[1952] How was it I hadn't heard any in the forest? [1953] Nor seen any.
[1955] It had not seemed strange to me. [1956] Had I heard any at the seaside?
[1957] Seagulls? [1958] I couldn't remember.
[1959] I remembered the corn-crakes.
[p. 108r]
[1960] The two travellers came back to my memory. [1961] One had a club. [1962] I had forgotten them. [1963] I saw the sheep again. [1964] Or so I say now. [1965] I didn't worry, other scenes of my life came back to me. [1966] There seemed to be rain, then sunshine, turn about. [1967] Real Spring weather. [1968] I longed to go back into the forest. [1969] Oh not a real longing. [1970] Molloy could stay, where he happened to be.