MS-UoR-1227-7-12-8

[0008] whether standing...or sitting...but the brain-what?..kneeling?...yes...
whether standing ...or sitting...or kneeling...but the brain. ^{[place = overwritten] -}..what?...
lying?...yes...whether standing...or sitting...or kneeling...or lying...
[0009]but the brain still...still...in a way...for her first thought was...
oh long after!...sudden flash...brought up as she had been to believe...
with the other waifs..in a merciful...(brief laugh)...God...(good laugh)

[0009]...[0010]first thought was...oh long after...sudden flash...she was being
punished...for her sins...a number of which then...furht ^{[place = overwritten] th}er proof if
proof were needed...flashed through her mind...one after another...[0011]then
dismissed as foolish...oh long after!...this thought dismissed...as
she suddenly realized...graduz ^{[place = overwritten] a}lly realized...she was not suffering...
imagine!...not suffering!... ^{[place = inline] -}indeed could not remember...off-hand...

[0011]when she had suffered less...unless of course she was...meant to be
suffering...ha!...thought to be suffering...just as the odd time...
in her life...when clearly intene ^{[place = overwritten] d}ed to be having pleasure...she was
in fact...having none...not the slightest...in which case of course...
that notion of punishment ...for some sin or other...or for the lot...
or no particular reason...for its own sake...thing she understood

[0011]perfectly...that notion of punishment...which had first occurred to her
...brought up as she had been to believe...with the other waifs...
in a merciful...(brief laugh)...God...(good laugh)...first occurred to
her...then dismissed...as foolish...was perhaps not so s ^{[place = overwritten] f}oolish...after
all...so on...all that...vain reasonings...[0012]till this other thought...oh

[0012]long after!...sudden flash...very foolish really but-... what?...
the buzzing?...yes...all the time the buzzing...so-called!...in the
ears... though of course actually...not in the ears at all...in the skull
...dull roar in the skull...and all the time this ray or beam...like
moonbeam...but probably not...certainly not...always the same spot...
now bright...now shrouded...but always the same spot...as no moon could...

[0012]no...no moon...just all part of the same wish to...torment...though
actually in point of fact...not in the least...not a twinge...so far...
ha!...so far...thid ^{[place = overwritten] s} other thought then...oh, ^{[place = margin right] [₰]} long after...sudden
flash...very foolish really but so like her...in a way...she might do
well to groan...on and off...writhe she could not...as if in actual...
agony...[0013]but could not...could not bring herself...some flaw in her
make-up...incapable of deceit...or the machine...more likely the

[0013]machine...so disconnected...never got the message...or powerless to
respomd ...like numbed...couldn't make the sound...not any sound...
no sound of any kind...no screaming for help for example...should she
feel so inclined...scream...(screams)...then listen...(silence)...
scream again...(screams again)...listen again...(silence)...no...
spared that...[0014]all silent as the grave...no part-...what?...the buzzing?
...yes...all silent but for the buzzing...so-called!...[0015]no part of her