MS-HRC-SB-4-3

[1906] catastrophe that has befallen me, a bless ing ^blessing in disguise.
[1907] How comforting that is. [1908] Catastrophe too in the ancient sense no
doubt. [1909] To be buried in lava and not turn a hair, it is then a
man shows what stuff he is made of. [1910] To know you can do better
next time, unrecognizably better, and that there is no next time,
and that it is a blessing there is not, there is a thought to be
going on with.

[1911] I thought I was turning the my stick to the best
possible account, like a monkey scratching itself ^{its fleas} with the stic
key that opens its cage. [1913] For it is obvious to me now that by making
a more intelligent use of my stick I might have extracted myself
from my bed and perhaps even got myself back into it, when tired
of rolling and dragging myself about the floor or on the stairs.
[1914] That would have introduced a little variety into my decomposition.

[1915] How is it it ^that never occurred to me? [1916] It is true I had no wish to
leave my bed. [1917] But can the sage have no wish for something the very
possibility of which he does not conceive? [1918] I don't understand. [1919] The
sage perhaps. [1920] But I? [1921] It is day again, at least what passes for such
here. [1922] I must have fallen asleep after a brief bout of discourage-
ment, such as I have not experienced for a long time. [1923] For why be
discouraged, one of the thieves was saved, that is a generous per-
cebⁿtage. [1924] I see the stick on the floor, not far from the bed.

[1925] That
is to say I see part of it, as of all one sees. [1926] It might just as
well be at the equator, or one of the poles. [1927] No, not quite, for
perhaps I shall devise a way of retrieving it, I am so ingenious.
[1928] All is not then yet quite irrevocably lost. [1929] In the meantime nothing
is mine any more, according to my definition, if I remember right-
ly, except my exercise-book, my lead and the French pencil, assuming